Let's Talk About Imposter Syndrome: Joe Tong
Let’s Talk About Imposter Syndrome is part of a recurring annual interview series where we dig deep into the issues which are affecting our community most, but that doesn’t get talked about all that often publicly.
Last year we talked about anxiety. This year we’re focused on something that may be even more of a stumbling block when you’re trying to run a business: imposter syndrome.
If you’ve ever felt like you don’t belong at the table or that what you’ve accomplished had more to do with good fortune than your own hard work and abilities (despite mountains of evidence to the contrary), then it’s fair to say this sneaky little devil has wormed its way into your life too.
An estimated 70% of people (more than 2/3 people) will experience imposter syndrome at some point or another, which means we should hear a lot more about it. But it has this way of keeping us from sharing and that’s because it wouldn’t have nearly as much power over us if we realized we’re all in the same boat together.
So here we are, dismantling the silos that imposter syndrome tends to create, and sharing the stories of six amazing people who have found success on their own terms, despite being confronted with these “fraudy” feelings on the reg. They’re bravely offering up their experiences and the tools they’ve used to fight back so that the rest of us can be inspired, motivated, and confident enough to do the same.
Introducing: Joe Tong
Next up, Joe Tong, a UBC Adjunct Professor, Apple Distinguished Educator, and #LGBTQI advocate who is spearheading a series called “100 Days of Queer” which takes a deeper look at the queer community through an educational lens.
WHEN DID YOU FIRST KNOW YOU WERE SUFFERING FROM IMPOSTER SYNDROME, LIKE REALLY PUT A NAME TO IT?
I would say the first time I started to (hesitantly) use the label of “imposter syndrome” was earlier this year (2019) in the summer when I was at a conference. The feelings that I often attributed to working through racial/queer stereotypes were re-explained and generalized using this term. I would argue that many people of colour, especially women of colour have suffered from “imposter syndrome” before it was labelled as this.
HOW HAS IMPOSTER SYNDROME MANIFEST IN YOUR OWN LIFE? WHAT DOES IT FEEL LIKE AND WHEN DOES IT HAPPEN MOST OFTEN?
Imposter syndrome is more of a personal journey for me. Though I do often make connections between imposter syndrome and my work in education, I have spent years working on my own presence as a human being rather than defining and attributing imposter syndrome to work and career alone.
I believe that having unclear boundaries between who we are and what we do can add fuel to imposter syndrome. When I defined who I was as a human being, through my work as a teacher, I was less effective as an educator when I measured my successes through how controlled, orderly, pretty, or rigid my practices looked (optics) on the outside and how my practice was perceived by others.
The more I cared about being a “Pinterest” teacher the less present and “in-the-moment” I was as an educator - this realization was incredible for my students, shifting from measuring their own successes based on learning (growth of their individual skills over time) to doing tasks in exchange for currency (marks).
I believe that this massive shift in education (in its beginning stages) will help combat imposter syndrome, as assessment and evaluation shifts from simple marks as rewards and measure of success, to a more reflective and contemplative, and evidence-based approach to defining learning.
CAN YOU DESCRIBE TIMES WHEN YOU FEEL IT THE MOST?
I’ve often been the youngest individual in the room, and often one of the only people of colour in the organizations I work with.
Naturally, when I became an educational consultant for a large school district at 28 and a university professor at 30 I felt like I did not belong in more ways than one. Here I was, teaching professionals and pre-service professionals that were often a decade or two older than I was, some being in the profession longer than I have been alive.
Thankfully I was embraced by a team of supportive mentors, all who were women and women of colour, who focused my efforts, offered me practical advice, and guided me to “see the light” and move forward with confidence.
Interestingly enough, this team of women helped me notice, name, and strategize through the misogynist and colonial values that continue to run through systems in most industries including education. Without them, I wouldn’t be able to focus on my passions and measure my success through deep happiness (presence and connection) vs. artificial happiness (power, money, and fame).
WHAT ABOUT WHEN IT SHOWS UP IN SMALL WAYS?
I would define imposter syndrome showing up in small ways as small glitches or lapses in my overall presence as a human being.
When I make decisions based on what I think I will get out of a situation, what I may receive from performing a task, or why I think others will say about me after I offer my services, I notice the symptoms of imposter syndrome heighten. If I am able to focus my attention and notice this is happening, I often reframe the present situation, reshape the task into one that requires me to be fully present, or disengage if the task will do more harm than good.
DO YOU EVER FEEL LIKE IMPOSTER SYNDROME HOLDS YOU BACK? IS THERE ANYTHING YOU WOULD HAVE DONE BUT DIDN’T BECAUSE OF IT? ANYTHING YOU WANT TO DO THAT YOU’RE NOT?
I believe identifying with imposter syndrome holds one back from being truly present and face issues head-on. The personal work that it takes to realize why we may encounter the symptoms of imposter syndrome is a difficult, deep, and emotional process. When we acknowledge and resist the systems and structures in organizations that feed on the pain that stems from imposter syndrome, we can begin to be the change in the systems.
Because I attribute many of my symptoms of imposter syndrome to various systems of oppression targeted at racial minority and queer identities, it was difficult for me to adopt an additional “imposter syndrome” label.
As the origins of imposter syndrome are rooted in the research of women and women of colour, I am skeptical the term may be misconstrued as an external excuse (for those who do not understand/experience intersections of sexism/racism) rather than a call-to-action to begin and/or continue personal work.
Check out all the posts in our Let’s Talk About Imposter Syndrome series .
